For me it was pretty easy to feel rejected by having Alopecia for all sorts of reasons. When I was younger an ex boyfriend cheated on me with someone who was thinner than me and had lovely long hair (the two things I wanted most in my early days of having Alopecia). This had an affect on the relationships I had after that and fear of rejection was the biggest and hardest thing I needed to work through in all my relationships.
It took some time to realise that I (having Alopecia and not being a size 6) was NOT the cause of the infidelity that was bestowed upon me, but that this person was simply not in love with me and he did not know how to express this (We were 18 after all). Never feel it is your fault, or the way you look for a partner cheating on you. After this, it took a very long time to trust my partners and even if they were completely faithful the fear of them straying or rejecting me was at times constantly at the back of my mind.
No matter how amazing my husband is (because he really is), it is still my responsibility to manage any irrational fears I may have of being rejected, not only from him but from my friends and family also. The way I do this is to make sure I have the best relationship with myself first, which includes a whole load of self care and self love. If you feel like self love is unattainable at the moment start by working on liking yourself first. Along with doing all the self carey things like pampering myself, going shopping, drinking lots of herbal teas and practicing yoga and meditation the main way I build that relationship with myself is to act like I am my best friend.
I would say I am a pretty good best friend to my best friend Bianca, I compliment her when she is feeling unattractive, I pick her up when she is down and I give her endless amounts of love, hugs and green tea.The more I apply these very same principles to myself, the more my self esteem increases, the more self like I have which eventually turns into self love. When I have self love, and this needs to be practiced regularly,
the irrational fears I have around being rejected are no longer around.
However topics like this are never really that straightforward but remember;
LOVE YOURSELF FIRST AND THEN YOU CAN LOVE AND BE LOVED BY OTHERS.
Thank you for reading x
It took some time to realise that I (having Alopecia and not being a size 6) was NOT the cause of the infidelity that was bestowed upon me, but that this person was simply not in love with me and he did not know how to express this (We were 18 after all). Never feel it is your fault, or the way you look for a partner cheating on you. After this, it took a very long time to trust my partners and even if they were completely faithful the fear of them straying or rejecting me was at times constantly at the back of my mind.
No matter how amazing my husband is (because he really is), it is still my responsibility to manage any irrational fears I may have of being rejected, not only from him but from my friends and family also. The way I do this is to make sure I have the best relationship with myself first, which includes a whole load of self care and self love. If you feel like self love is unattainable at the moment start by working on liking yourself first. Along with doing all the self carey things like pampering myself, going shopping, drinking lots of herbal teas and practicing yoga and meditation the main way I build that relationship with myself is to act like I am my best friend.
I would say I am a pretty good best friend to my best friend Bianca, I compliment her when she is feeling unattractive, I pick her up when she is down and I give her endless amounts of love, hugs and green tea.The more I apply these very same principles to myself, the more my self esteem increases, the more self like I have which eventually turns into self love. When I have self love, and this needs to be practiced regularly,
However topics like this are never really that straightforward but remember;
LOVE YOURSELF FIRST AND THEN YOU CAN LOVE AND BE LOVED BY OTHERS.
Thank you for reading x
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