When you don't understand the power of positivity and self care it's easy to beat yourself up right?
I was between 14 and 15 years old when I initially found that 10 pence piece bald patch on the back of my head. It was not something that I had experienced before so I didn't know what to do about it. So I did what a lot of us may do, covered it up and hoped and prayed it wouldn't get any worse. 3 weeks had passed, I had barely slept with the worry and it was time to tell someone what had happened. I showed my mum and like any concerned parent she rushed me to my GP, baring in mind this was around 16 years ago and Alopecia was not as familiar as it is today. The GP had diagnosed me with Alopecia and told me not to worry as my hair will grow back. This was not the case and I had lost all my hair on my scalp within 3/4 years of finding that first patch.
I have tried many methods in order to grow my hair back but I will talk about that in another post.
But here I was a young lady who did not conform to how society saw young women, not because I chose to but because my Alopecia chose to. My relationship with myself became non existent, I would berate myself on a daily basis, look in the mirror with sadness and disgust, my anger issue became far more than an issue, it became a huge problem within my life and with the people I had come into contact with, I started to self harm before school just to cope with facing another day amongst other people my age, I drank heavily at University and I stopped eating after graduation.
Looking back on this time I have apologised to myself profusely with the way I treated myself. No one should ever be treated like that by anyone let alone by themselves. I had already so much to deal with and then I added more stress to my situation with how I manged having Alopecia. This goes to show that when we are faced with something, if we react in a negative way like I did everything gets worse but if we react in more positive ways then YES I still would have had Alopecia but the experience would have been completely different.
TODAY I choose to say only nice things about myself
I choose to have a positive relationship with myself
I choose to eat and drink healthy
I choose to manage my emotions in a healthier way
I choose to self heal rather than self harm
I choose to love myself
Thank you for reading x
I have tried many methods in order to grow my hair back but I will talk about that in another post.
But here I was a young lady who did not conform to how society saw young women, not because I chose to but because my Alopecia chose to. My relationship with myself became non existent, I would berate myself on a daily basis, look in the mirror with sadness and disgust, my anger issue became far more than an issue, it became a huge problem within my life and with the people I had come into contact with, I started to self harm before school just to cope with facing another day amongst other people my age, I drank heavily at University and I stopped eating after graduation.
Looking back on this time I have apologised to myself profusely with the way I treated myself. No one should ever be treated like that by anyone let alone by themselves. I had already so much to deal with and then I added more stress to my situation with how I manged having Alopecia. This goes to show that when we are faced with something, if we react in a negative way like I did everything gets worse but if we react in more positive ways then YES I still would have had Alopecia but the experience would have been completely different.
TODAY I choose to say only nice things about myself
I choose to have a positive relationship with myself
I choose to eat and drink healthy
I choose to manage my emotions in a healthier way
I choose to self heal rather than self harm
I choose to love myself
Thank you for reading x
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